Self Employed Success

In Part 1 of this article, I gave you some ideas on how to spot a crazymaker client (or student, or business partner, or mastermind group member – whomever you have a close business relationship with).

Now that you’ve got a list of how to spot them, you might be able to avoid getting into a business relationship with a potential crazymaker client. Sometimes you don’t know you’ve got a crazymaker client until you’re already working with them because they’re good at hiding their crazymaking traits until they’ve won your trust.

I think it’s time to bring in the pros, so I interviewed Wendy Pitts Reeves, a psychotherapist from Maryville, TN about how to deal with crazymakers. She’s been a mental health professional since 1981, and she’s a small business owner. If anyone knows how to deal with the difficult people in your business life, Wendy does.

Your own happiness and the health of your business must be your first priority.

When someone’s repeated behavior causes you concern, you have a right to protect yourself. Remember, you’re looking for patterns of behavior and how that client makes you feel.

Having someone act badly once may be a coincidence or a bad day; when they do it a second and third time, you’ve spotted a crazymaker and you need to handle it.

The Three Basic Steps

• First, admit to yourself that this is an unhealthy relationship. Trust your gut when something doesn’t feel normal. Check out Part 1 of this article where I talk about some ways to spot a crazymaker client. Speak with your colleagues, mentor or mastermind group to double-check your feelings about the situation and get an outside perspective.
• Second, give yourself permission to require boundaries in your business and be willing to enforce those boundaries as necessary.
• Third, ask your client to change their behavior, but don’t expect it to happen. They’ve gotten along for many years with this type of behavior and they’re unlikely to change just because you ask them to. If the relationship is worth saving, it’s worth asking for change.

18 Ways to Deal with Crazymaker Clients

There’s an old saying, “Rewarded behavior is repeated behavior.” Remember that the reward that crazymakers are seeking is a sense of control, typically by creating a negative atmosphere and/or making you doubt yourself. If you allow this to happen, you are rewarding this toxic behavior and it will continue.

1. Put everything in writing. Get them to sign-off on any major decisions, project plans, designs, and task priorities in writing. Wendy Pitts Reeves says, “Set boundaries about what you expect, in writing, and then they can choose to comply or not. Be clear about your policies, procedures, fees, cancellation policies, schedule, and availability.”
2. Constantly push back to the agreed-upon boundaries. Don’t let them keep bending the rules. Learn to say no. Don’t say yes, just to avoid conflict. Here are several ways to learn how to say no.
3. Tell them when something is outside the scope of the original project or agreement, and that it will cost them extra (or that you can’t do it).
4. Set and manage expectations. Tell them what’s going to happen next and how long it will take. If they want to accomplish something in 4 weeks that you know takes 6 months to accomplish, say so.
5. Remind them what will happen if they break the contract.
6. Talk to them about their behavior and ask them to change it.
7. Get them to pay up-front, or in deposits before you do more work for them.
8. Educate them on the process you use, on unfamiliar vocabulary, on anything that might hinder communication.
9. Be clear about deadlines, especially when they owe you information or a decision, or they have to take a certain action by a specific date.
10. Put your fees, price list, and any other financial information in writing, preferably in a contract. Have them sign the contract.
11. Limit communication to scheduled appointments; don’t answer emails just because your Inbox indicator flashes. If you’ve told them you don’t work evenings and weekend, never answer emails or phone calls from them on evenings or weekends.
12. If you don’t have it already, get Caller ID on your phone, so you can tell when it’s the crazymaker calling. Let voicemail pick it up.
13. If you will be out of the office for a day or longer, email them in advance of when you’ll be away and when you will return.
14. If they twist what was said verbally in a phone call, use email to communicate. At minimum, follow up all phone calls with an email “summary” of key points. Keep all emails, even after the project is over.
15. Don’t let their crisis become your crisis. If you’ve stated that you are not available for immediate tasks, don’t do an “emergency” task just to please the client; they’ll come to expect this type of behavior from you again and again. If it’s a true emergency and you agree to help them, explain to them what your additional fee is.
16. Keep asking them what THEY are going to do to resolve the problem. Don’t try to fix everything for them. Help them to create action plans and to implement them. (This is especially true in mastermind groups.)
17. Ask them what outcomes they want. Make them come up with concrete goals.
18. If the client doesn’t comply with the rules, if their attitude and behavior is causing problems and they’re not willing to change, let them go. Walk away from the business relationship. It is not worth hanging on to a client who is harming you and your business.

Don’t Get Defensive

Don’t get into an argument with a crazymaker or spend extraordinary amounts of time and energy defending yourself. They seek power, and when you become defensive, you have given them that power. Instead, listen to them, repeat back to them what you’re hearing, but don’t fall into their trap. Do not play their game.

Wendy says, “Stay neutral. Thank them for sharing their comments and thoughts, but don’t get into an argument with them about what’s right or wrong.” Say something like, “It’s interesting that you heard me say X when I really said Y, and I’m a little curious about that,” or ” I notice this certain behavior keeps happening and I’m curious about why you keep doing that.” Not judgmental or critical, just putting it out there. Then pay attention to their reaction. If they’re defensive, you’re not likely to get anywhere; if they’re open and interested, the relationship might be worth saving.

Happier You

A great final tip from Wendy Pitts Reeves: “Seek consultation. Talk to colleagues and friends, your coach or mastermind group, to think out loud about this problem. Someone who has a little distance, someone whose advice you trust and respect. State the facts, state how it makes you feel (you’re already emotionally involved and you can’t see clearly). They can help you be objective and get clarity about blind spots, and can brainstorm about what to do in each situation. Many small business owners work alone and having a group of people who you can connect with around things like this is essential.”

No one wants to think that this will happen to them, yet many, many people emailed me or posted blog comments after Part 1 of this article to say that this had, indeed, happened to them. Keeping your eyes open to people’s behavior and being willing to deal with problems when they arise will make your business a much happier place.

Did you find this blog post helpful? Let me know your thoughts in the comments section below. And if YOU have any suggested ways to deal with crazymakers, I’m all ears!

When reinventing your business, take a fresh look at your customers, both who you’re serving now, and who you want to serve in the future.

Have a mobile device? Watch the YouTube version here: http://youtu.be/nj8qt2UqrIk

Worksheet:

• Ideation: Customer Segments (PDF)

Audio MP3 of this tutorial:

• Audio 3 – Re/vision: A Fresh Way to Look at Your Customers (MP3)

Previous Videos in this Series:

• Video 1 – Re/vision: A Fresh Way to Transform Your Business
• Video 2 – Re/vision: A Fresh Way to Look at Your Goals for Business Reinvention

Dealing with difficult clients?

I hear horrific stories all the time from my colleagues and clients about their own customers who constantly step outside the boundaries of what’s considered good social behavior.

Sure, we all make mistakes from time-to-time, but these folks make a nasty habit of it.

Your overall health and your quality of business life matters. Identifying and dealing with crazymakers will give you a helping hand in creating the business you want.

Are your clients making you crazy? Your health and the health of your business matters. Tweet This!

I’m sure you’ll recognize some of these types of customers:

1. The Non-payer: They promise to pay, they may even have a contract, but over and over again the check doesn’t arrive. They pretend they didn’t get your invoice, or your emails, or your phone calls.
2. The Verbal Twister: They “remember” everything you say, and will tell you that you said (and meant) something completely different than your actual words. They take all your words and interpret them in their own way, especially when it’s not possible for you to remember everything you’ve ever said.
3. The Complainer: Everything in their life sucks, and they tell you about it ad nauseam, every chance they get; also known as The Squeaky Wheel because they feel if they make enough noise, they’ll get more attention. Also akin to The Energy Vampire — every time you come in contact with them, you walk away feeling drained, exhausted and debilitated.
4. I Love You, But: This crazymaker starts off praising you. They say things like, “I love your work,” or “You really understand me.” In the next sentence they rip you apart, accusing you of double-dealing, sub-standard work, or unethical behavior on your part, completely out of the blue. This “give then take” approach keeps you off balance, which is the whole point.
5. The Rusher: Always in a hurry to get something done and doesn’t care if you’re busy with other projects or other customers. They say things like, “I want it yesterday,” or “I know you said you have no open appointments, but can you sneak me in first thing tomorrow morning?”

That’s just a starter list; there are many more crazymaker types out there. I know you’ve run into customers whose repeated bad behavior has you scratching your head in bewilderment. I’d love to hear your stories…share them in the Comments below, okay? We all benefit by reading about other people’s experiences with crazymaker clients.

Remember, unless you are a psychotherapist or psychiatrist, you are not trained to identify crazymakers upon first meeting them, so don’t beat yourself up if one of these people sneaks into your business life. Even trained mental health practioners cannot always instantly spot a crazymaker.

In Part 2 of this blog post, I’ll give you some tips on how to deal with the crazymaker clients in your business life.

Save 20% on the live teleseminars, audio programs, and ebooks you want!

Whether you’re just getting started in business or are looking to make your business better, we have everything you need to succeed.

This discount good for any audio program, ebook, or upcoming live teleseminar (yes, including the Compass: Your Roadmap to Business Reinvention teleseminar series which begins January 24).

Order online at www.PassionForBusiness.com and use coupon code JANJOY to get your exclusive savings.

See my Shop for all audios and ebooks.

This special offer expires January 23 at midnight, so don’t wait — start shopping now! This discount is for any product or upcoming teleseminar in my Small Business Learning Center. Coupon cannot be applied to previous orders.

Thanks for being a Passion For Business customer!